Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Living one day at a time

I live one day at a time now. I don't think about the week ahead, the month head, the year ahead or the decade ahead. I know of some recovering addicts who have not relapsed to their addiction for 10 years now. 10 years and they are still recovering. One an addict always an addict. I am an addict and will always be. That is the title of this blog. I am an addict for life. I always keep that in my mind. It will only take one sip for me to go back to my alcoholism whether I've been sober for a day or for a year or even 10 years. So I better don't touch that bottle.

Last weekend, I was confronted by 2 tempting situations. My brother invited me to visit his restaurant/bar in Makati to discuss some personal business. While discussing, he was drinking San Mig Light. He courteously offered me the same drink but I begged off. I instead opted for a Coke in can. 30 minutes into the meeting, he ordered again another bottle of San Mig Light. At that time I felt very thirsty and I was already craving for the alcoholic beverage in front of me. My addict mind is playing tricks on me again. But I focused myself on the agenda of our meeting and I decided to wrap the meeting or else I may not be able to hold myself back from taking that first sip again. I went home and I was congratulated by my wife and kids for successfully resisting the temptation. I felt good about it.

The next day we went to my father's house to celebrate his 70th birthday. At the back of the house, beer overflowed and there was this long table with all my cousins and other drinking buddies. They offered me to drink but I just told them that I will be back a little later because I still haven't taken my dinner. I went back to my father's house and stayed there for good. It surprised me because I didn't crave that time. I did not go back to my cousins to drink and I was able to keep my focus away and stayed with my non-drinking relatives.

Two accomplishments in one weekend. It strengthens my resolve not to go back to drinking. I told my wife the next morning, I don't miss drinking and I don't miss the hang-over. It is always a nice feeling to welcome each morning in good spirit with new-found focus in life.